The Storage Unit

…A lot like a rabbit hole. Once you’re in it, you regret it.

We all have a lot of stuff.

We live in 2000, 3000, 4000 and bigger square foot homes.

We have one, two or three-car garages.

We have sheds in our back yards.

Our closets are full of clothes, shoes and stuff

Our spare bedrooms are full of stuff

Our garages are full of everything but the car

Our sheds are full of stuff

We have so much stuff that we can’t bring home any more stuff

But we can’t part with any of this stuff

We need a place to put some of it so we can buy more stuff

We need to rent a storage unit.

For about 100 bucks a month

We can make room in the closets for more shoes and clothes.

We can have overnight company again

We can park at least one car in the garage

We can even make room in the shed for the lawn mower.

We can rent the unit for a few months until we decide what to do with this stuff.

Fast forward about a dozen years . . .

Honey, do you think there is room in the storage unit for some of this stuff? It would be nice to be able to have overnight company again and park the car in the garage on those snowy nights.

It’s been years since we put our stuff in there. Let’s go see.

Why are we storing our old computers and printers, this broken exercise machine, that typewriter, hundreds of stuffed animals, college textbooks, notebooks and papers? Old sheets and towels?

Remember when Uncle Charley sat in that chair and ended up on the floor and plate of food on his lap?

Are you ever going to wear any of these clothes or shoes ever again? Look @ all the mice droppings everywhere.

Are we ready to spend another $15,000 to keep this stuff for another dozen years?

How are we going to get rid of this stuff to make room for more stuff?

Maybe the ReStore will take some of this stuff. Not good enough.

Maybe put a little out with the trash every week? Take too long and in the meantime, we can’t store our new stuff there. Another $5,000 in rent.

Plastic bags with stickers? $5,000 in stickers and another $3,000 in rent.

Offer the unit to the producers of Storage Wars?

Better yet let’s host our own Holliston Storage Wars. There must be plenty of units that people can’t get away from. We’ll advertise on Holliston Trading Post, I’m Holliston Happy (but not on I’m Holliston Crabby) and Holliston Reporter.

We can even donate the proceeds to I Have Too Much Stuff Anonymous.

But we’re not going to the auction. We might bid on one of the units.

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Paul Saulnier

1 Comment

  1. Anne Ferrante on July 31, 2021 at 12:48 pm

    I find this article very humorous because it hits home. Sometime in the near future I plan to move to a maintenance free facility such as a condo, but not a nursing home! It will be necessary for me to divest myself of many of my possessions. Thus, I would like to begin with a rock pile that is under the pine trees in my front yard. There is also a stone wall on the front of my property and those rocks are not to be removed. For anyone who is interest in owning the pile of rocks that is under the pine trees, can give me a call leaving your name and number on the answering machine, 429-6745.