Maybe he should have shot himself and then taken the strychnine:

June 27, 1890 – About 9:30 Monday forenoon, James Harrison Stone committed suicide by taking a dose of strychnine.  He was attended by Drs. Atkins and Pope, but the fatal dose had taken effect so rapidly that their medical skill was of no avail. He had planned to shoot himself with a revolver after taking the poison, but so quick was the action that he was unable to fulfill his intentions.

Mustangs were fast even back then:

August 29, 1890 – A serious carriage smashup occurred on Washington street nearly opposite the residence of John Allen, Friday evening.  A mustang driven for Joshua Smith, South Framingham, was at the town pump to water, when he gave a sudden leap and left his driver and ran at a fearful pace for home.

A raid to the wise:

The first liquor raid for a long time was made Friday afternoon by Deputy Sheriff Esty and Officer Cotton of South Framingham, on the saloon in John O’Brien’s building, run by John Gallagher.  The following booty was secured:  4-1/2 barrels of beer, 3 gallons of whiskey, one gallon of rum, one gallon of cherry rum, 5 cases of lager.  Bartender Gallagher skipped the town on a lively run.  Other dealers in the ardent in the vicinity removed their stock in a hurry.  

Girls just want to have fun:

September 12, 1890 – Officer Baker arrested a party of South Framingham girls with driver Sunday evening for disturbing the peace by loud singing as they drove about the town.  They were released after sincere promises of future good behavior.

Boys just want to have fun:

September 27, 1890 – Boys have recently been in the habit of taking rides on the rear of the midday freight trains, one of whom had a narrow excape from injury Tuesday. Better stop that fun or you’ll get badly hurt.

A maximum height sign might have helped:

Charles Partridge attempted to pass through the Exchange street arch with a Millis barge Wednesday, and had the entire top torn from the body of the barge.

Who knows – maybe Patrick couldn’t swim:

September 11, 1891 – Patrick Slavin stole some clothes from his father and decamped.  Police looked for him, and when he returned home, he was arrested. He pleaded guilty to the charge, and was given the choice of a sentence in the house of correction or an enlistment in the navy.  His father bailed him out at a cost of $100 to give him the opportunity to enlist.  Officer Curran took him to Boston to enlist but was unable to enter him.  He was returned to Holliston and sentenced to five months in prison.